


Safehavens

by TheFlamingFalcon



Category: Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Anxiety Attacks, Connor is his therapist, Connor thinks emotions are weird, Gay Panic, Haphephobia, M/M, Markus is oblivious, Maybe - Freeform, Panic Attacks, Simon is gay, Slow Updates, Tad of Fluff, The Author Regrets Everything, Unrequited Crush, Unrequited Love, i'll warn you, probably not, tags will change as each chapter is uploaded
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-24
Updated: 2019-06-24
Packaged: 2020-05-16 15:07:42
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,742
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19320631
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheFlamingFalcon/pseuds/TheFlamingFalcon
Summary: It's been over half a year since the android revolution and things are starting to settle down. There's still no end of android hate, but hey, just last year they were property, this is a good step up.Simon,,,Oh boy. He has a lot. Anxiety and haphephobia (fear of being touched) continue to fuck up his normal day functioning, but hey, at least he has someone who clings to him 24/7Oh and did I mention he's big homo for Markus? B i g homo. Markus is a dumbass and continues to stay with even thought we all know she's in gay denial herself.Connor's basically Simon's therapist at this point. Like, he's a bro.Also note - this story had an original version that I decided to scrap cause I wasn't happy with it. I'll be reusing a lot of stuff directly from that, including maybe even quotes and stuff. The original one with still be available to read, but I highly recommend staying with this oneAlso I literally have no upload schedule ha I don't have my life together just yet so. Yeah/





	1. And so it Begins

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! 'S me. Whether you came from the last one or this is you first time reading something of mine, thanks for being here! Now that that's out of the way,I want to warn you this isn't the most exciting story. Unless something changes, there won't be a whole lot of action and if more just a continuation of the previous game, just more homo.  
> I'm tempted to actually write something where Simon and Markus actually,,,are happy. So if you want to see something more fluffy, just tell me!  
> But for now you're stuck with this. I'll always warn you if something like a panic attack is coming up, so you won't be going in blind.  
> With all that being said, enjoy!

Simon walked up to the door of Jericho Headquarters, another android clutching to his arm like a vice and looking fearfully around.  
A soft, feminine voice from above said _”Welcome home, Simon”_ and the doors slid open. What was called Jericho Headquarters was actually the mansion of Markus’s old owner, Carl. Markus still clung to the name ‘Jericho’, even though the original place had been blown sky high. Simon guessed it was a reminder of where we came from and how far we’d gotten.  
  
The android on Simon’s arm suddenly squeezed tighter as they entered the house. It sent a wave of discomfort through the poor blond. It wasn’t the consrictiveness, but more the fact someone else was touching him. It had gotten better over the months since the revolution, but it never fully faded.  
  
As the doors closed behind him, Simon called out to Josh, who was sitting on the steps upstairs and attempting to flip a coin.  
  
“Are there any spare rooms left?”  
  
Josh looked up and blanked for a moment before regaining his thoughts. “Oh uh, yeah! Sorry, my brain was on autopilot. I think most of them are open, only two are occupied if I’m remembering right. What’s your friend’s story?”  
  
The android hanging onto Simon started twitching and his eyes widened. Well, the eye that could widen, anyway.  
  
“I’ll tell you later.” Simon said, passing Josh and moving to the back of the house.  
  
What was once Carl’s painting studio was now turned into a mini safehaven for those found injured or on the street. There were two rooms put along each side and a wide one in the back. They weren’t the most spacious, but it was the best that could be done. There were android “safehavens”, for lack of a better word stored all around the country, with the most in Detroit. It’s where CyberLife dumped all of them when they were forced to let all the androids they still had free. Detroit was honestly almost 50:50 with humans and androids, seeing as everyone fled here, knowing that this is where Markus is. It’s where it all started  
  
Today was July 9th, 2039, _It’s the anniversary of-_ Simon cut off his thoughts. It was slowly but surely nearing a year of Androids having freedom.  
  
Simon took the android on his arm to the last room on the left.  
  
“This is where you can stay a while, until we figure out where you can go. It’s not much, but...It’s better than the alleyway I found you in. I need to go soon, do you think you’ll be alright on you own for a while?”  
  
“Ralph doesn’t want him to leave, no-no he doesn’t. Ralph with stay with him.”  
  
Simon smiled weakly. _Oh, who hurt you, buddy?_. “Alright, I’ll stay a while, but I’ll have to leave in a bit okay?”  
  
“No, Ralph will go where he goes.”  
  
Resigned, Simon gently sat down on the bed set up in the well-lit room. The sun was nearing the horizon and setting a nice glow on everything. A pack of blue blood and biocomponents sat under a table, but Ralph didn’t seem to need those. The damage wasn’t physical.  
  
With the growing silence, the feeling of contact on his arm grew worse. Androids couldn’t _feel_ persay, but there were messages sent from sensors to the mind palace like nerves would to a human brain that told him of contact. It was _like_ feeling, Simon guessed, but he didn’t have anything to compare it to. But still, whenever someone came in contact, it sent this wave of internalized panic and over-discomfort. It’s why he wore hoodies all the time.

  


__The sun set and the room became dim. Ralph eventually curled up into the corner of the bed with his knees to his chest and Simon got up to turn on the lamp, leaving the sheets slightly rustled behind him. The small room flooded with the warm light. It was an old school lamp, courtesy of Carl. It was very cozy.  
  
Simon stepped back over the bed and took off his jacket and draped it around Ralph.  
  
“I’m going upstairs for a moment, but call me if you need anything.” Ralph ticked and nodded silently. Simon got up and walked over to the curtain and couldn’t help but run his eyes along Ralph’s scar before walking out. Whatever happened in his past, Ralph would never be the same because of. He left, closing the curtain behind him and walked back over to the steps, feeling paranoid about the lack of cover on his arms. At this point, Josh had left. He considered looking for him to ask if Markus was home, but he decided against it.  
  
Simon walked upwards, looking at the paintings all around him. He felt bad for Carl. The old man was too weak to paint anymore, and spent most of his time reading old books. At least he seemed content.  
  
Simon knocked on the door that was normally where Markus and North stayed. North was out in West Virginia, if he remembered correctly, it was one of the few states that was still resisting androids, so she was visiting to help clear everything up.  
  
The door opened and and Simon tried to ignore the jump in his gut when he saw who was standing in the doorway.  
  
“Simon? Josh said you brought in another android that looked like it thought you were the second coming of rA9 themself, so I got kinda worried that you were down there for so long.”  
  
Simon again ignored the flutter he felt. “It looks like he went through some stuff. I found him in an alleyway, all bunched into himself and had wide eyes. Connor and Hank called me because they couldn’t get within ten feet of him without being threatened with a knife.”  
  
Markus opened the door wider and gestured for Simon to come in. He hesitated a small bit but entered and sat down in a chair at a desk.  
  
Simon continued his thought with, “His LED didn’t go off red once. I haven’t pressed him about his past, but,” Simon paused. “It can’t be good.”  
  
Markus gently closed the door and sat on his bed, hunched over, with his elbows on his knees.  
  
A moment of silence passed before Markus spoke..  
  
“Every day, I hear stories of androids getting beat up, molested, or tortured and killed. Even with everything I’ve done it-” He cut off, lost in his thoughts.  
  
“Markus,” Simon said, he had a strange inflection in his voice that he couldn’t tell if it was worry or sympathy or whatever the hell other emotions there were. Markus raised his head to meet Simon’s eyes.”It…All of that was already happening before you came to Jericho. Every day was every hour. We were property, so no one cared enough to mention it. Look at what you’ve done. The steps that have been taken. Now, crimes against androids are treated just as harshly as ones against humans. Whatever happens, we aren’t slaves anymore. It hasn’t even been a year since we were first seen as people and we’ve still made great strides since then. It…” He trailed off, getting caught up in his words.  
  
Markus curled his hands into fists and the room stayed quiet for about a minute before  
  
“How are your eyes doing?” Markus said, relaxing his hands.  
  
“They’re as good as they’ll get. They said that I’ll have to deal, because they can’t get new optical units without a high chance of messing up my memory. So, I guess I’m stuck like this for however long I hang in there. It’s not so bad, just a bit more muddled than normal. I can still see details fine enough at least. Say a human with low perscription. It’s just every so often I have to strain”  
  
Markus clenched his jaw and looked at the ground grimly.  
  
“You really shot yourself?”  
  
Silence, and then “Yes, I did.”  
  
“Simon, it’s a miracle we could even get you from the DPD, let alone reactivate you-”  
  
“I didn’t think there was a chance in the first place, I was ready to die if it meant a higher chance of our people being let free.”  
  
“Right. For the cause. For Jericho.” Markus said, painfully.  
  
Simon was about to reply when his LED flashed yellow and he went quiet for a moment.  
  
“Ralph wants me.”  
  
“Alright, you always have had a knack for taking care of people.”  
  
“You forget what I was designed to do.”  
  
Simon sat up and walked over to the door, he was shutting it before stopping and glancing behind him to Markus, who was sitting with his forehead in his hands. He looked away and shut the door. He dropped to the floor, resting his head against the wood. Damn these feelings.  
  


__When Simon walked downstairs and headed to where Ralph was, he saw Josh was in standby on the couch in front of the TV. It was a strange thing. Androids didn’t need to sleep, but they all had the feature to go into ‘standby mode’. For all accounts, from the outside it looked just like human sleep with eyes closed and even simulated breathing. It all depended on the model, but for most it was a way to let their systems cool down and make sure memory is stored and safe. It gives a break from the stress a self-operating system puts on itself. Normally it would only be for a few hours a day or more likely every other day, some more advanced models only need about 30 minutes a week, but since the revolution, many had adopted the eight hours a human would have. It could be a source of comfort or perhaps even escape, it all depended on the person. Simon, personally, only got about five hours every day. Out of the four main members of Jericho, he did the most behind the scenes work. He set up safehavens and scouted for damaged androids. North and Markus did the most PR and in-the-cameras work, and Josh did a mixture of both. Lately though, they didn’t really need to do much besides, well, live. Simon found it hard to do nothing, and was usually caring for at least two androids at a time. It was his escape, and rA9 knows he had a lot to run from._ _


	2. Finding New Beginnings

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so for this one, I want to warn you it's not that exciting. It won't be as fun to read, but it's necessary for story progression.  
> Good luck and I hope you like it regardless!

Simon slid over the curtain to Ralph’s temporary room, he was still huddled in the corner, but instead of Simon’s jacket being draped around him, he was hugging it tightly.  
  
“Are you okay?” Simon asked.  
  
“Ralph was alone before, Ralph doesn’t want to be alone again.”  
  
Simon felt a pang for the poor guy, he knew the feeling.  
  
“It’s okay.” Simon walked over and crawled up onto the bed, sitting close to the damaged android. “I’ll stay here.”  
  
Ralph looked over, the unharmed side of his face towards Simon. He looked around before saying softly “Thank you.” His LED flashed blue for a moment, before returning to the normal steady yellow.  
  
The uncomfortable feeling of not having anything on his arms returned, but it wasn’t as bad as before.  
  
Simon tilted his head back to rest on the wall, palms facing upwards on his lap. This was normally how he got his ‘sleep’, by spending time with androids who needed something to latch onto. They were always found damaged, whether it be physically or mentally, sometimes both. The ones that never had anything that loved them always immediately reached out and attached their emotions to whatever they could, just so they could feel something other than hurt and abandonment. And for many, they clung to Simon, who was often the first friendly face they had seen in a long time. It was tragic, and even moreso that Simon had gotten used to it.  
  
He felt a sudden pressure on his side and shoulder and fought the urge to jerk away. Ralph had leaned against him, still hugging Simon’s jacket tightly.  
  
Once the mini panic subsided, Simon found himself berating himself for wishing it were someone else.  
  
Eventually, his thoughts slowly slipped away and he fell into sleep.

 

He awoke to Ralph clicking the lamp on and off repeatedly, a dumb smile on his face.  
  
Simon quickly snapped out of the loopiness from being asleep and chuckled at the childlike wonder Ralph had invested in said lamp.  
  
“What do you like about the lamp, Ralph?”  
  
“There is light! And then there is not! And then,” Ralph turned it off. “There is a click that shows it’s changed!”  
  
Simon smiled weakly. “That it does.” He got up and turned the lamp off when Ralph switched it on again. “Come on, it’s daytime now, is there something you want to do?”  
  
What Simon normally did when androids didn’t have any physical harm interfering with them, but weren’t ready to leave yet, was to spend some time with them for a while and slowly acquaint them with the world again. Then find a place where they could start again.  
  
“Ralph? What does Ralph want? R-Ralph doesn’t…” he looked down, seeming to be thinking.  
  
In sympathy, Simon said “Why don’t we take a walk? It’s a quiet neighborhood, and it’s early so I doubt anyone will be up and about.”  
  
Ralph nodded.  
  
Josh was still in the living room, this time awake and watching TV.  
  
“Anything of interest?” Simon asked as Ralph started to hang onto his arm again.  
  
Josh sighed and switched it off. “Nothing much, there was a small segment about how North is in West Virginia clearing stuff up, but besides that, nothing about androids.”  
  
“I see. Alright, I’m going to be out today, if anyone asks.” Simon doubted they would, but it was worth a shot.  
  
“Alright, I’ll message you if anything happens.”  
  
Simon walked out the door with Ralph trying to practically dissolve into him. It was uncomfortable, but not too bad.  
  
The day was fairly peaceful. At first, the pair walked around the neighborhood. The houses were sparse, seeing as everyone who lived here was reasonably rich and had a lot of space, but it could still be considered a neighborhood enough. Ralph got excited when he saw the large garden that took up someone’s entire front lawn, and it took a moment for Simon to remember that Ralph was a WR600, one of the 5,000 that were meant for taking care of Detroit’s parks. He’d only seen one or two after the revolution, as most had been killed. He figured Ralph must have been in hiding.  
  
Seeing as it was a Sunday, most people didn’t really have any place to be, so once the sun rose higher, Simon asked if Ralph wanted to go around the city, seeing as less people would be there to freak Ralph out. It was Simon’s way of trying to get Ralph used to civilization again. He was reluctant, but agreed. He got more and more panicky as he saw humans and pushed himself into Simon as hard as he could. Simone seriously wondered if they’d merge into one.  
  
As the day went on, he was starting to lose hope of getting a new life started for Ralph, he hated humans and was extremely unstable. But Simon couldn’t just take care of him forever...  
  
Eventually, when the sun was hiking back down to the horizon, they hopped in a self-driving taxi and rode back to Jericho Headquarters.  
  
They saw the large garden again, but this time, an elderly lady was kneeling and taking care of it.  
  
It took a second, but Simon recognized her.  
  
A month or so ago, on a street near here, she had recognized him as one of the members of Jericho and started a conversation.  
  
She had congratulated him and said that before the revolution, she’d had an android that helped her take care of her garden and she loved as a son, but that he was killed during the revolution.  
  
_So what if-_  
  
Simon gently tapped at the low fence wooden fence that surrounded her house. She looked up and after recognizing him,practically glowed. She walked over to the gate in a small trot.  
  
“Simon! It took me a moment to recognize you, dear. What are you doing here? And who’s your friend?”  
  
“I live near here, actually, I just didn’t know this garden belonged to you. As for him…” He paused. “Can I talk to you a moment?”  
  
“Of course dear, come on in.” She opened the small gate and let Simon and Ralph in.  
  
Simon turned his head down to Ralph and said quietly to him. “Go ahead, look around, see how you feel.”  
  
Ralph muttered, half to himself and half to Simon. “Ralph doesn’t like humans. Humans hurt Ralph. No, no he doesn’t like them at all.” His LED was frantically switching between yellow and red.  
  
Simon started to doubt himself, but persisted. “It’s alright, I’ll be close at hand. I promise no harm will come to you.”  
  
Ralph looked doubtful himself, but let go slowly and kneeled down to touch one of the many flowers surrounding them.  
  
Trying not to look too relieved, Simon turned back to the elderly woman. “Sorry about that. And sorry, even though we talked at a point, I never got your name.”  
  
“Oh, Lydia Lambert.” Simon recognized the name, she used to be an actress.  
  
“I see, so, you told me that you used to have an android that helped you around the house and with your garden?”  
  
“That I did, Sean, I miss him very much, but I know he went for a just cause.”  
  
Simon paused, not knowing how he wanted to phrase this. “So, as you know, my name is Simon and I’m a member of Jericho. I mostly help set up safehavens and help androids find new lives, and since- well. Yesterday, a friend of mine found him in an alleyway and called me over, knowing this was my area of expertise. We both noticed very quickly that he obviously hasn’t had very...good interactions with humans in the past, and seeing as how he’s designed to be a gardener, I thought someone like you would be willing to give him a chance.” Simon said this relatively quickly, wondering if he’d made a mistake  
  
Ms. Lambert thought but eventually spoke “I see. I can’t promise anything, but, I’ll think, could I talk to him?”  
  
Simon once again hesitated, not knowing if this was a good idea or not. “His name is Ralph, and...well, he’s...you’ll see. I don’t know how he’d react but I’m willing to give it a try.  
  
Simon turned around and knelt beside Ralph, who was still looking at the flowers in front of him with a strange fixation.  
  
“Ralph? Can you talk to her? I promise she won’t hurt you, and if everything goes well, you’ll have a garden again. Besides, I’ll still be near.”  
  
Ralph obviously didn’t want to, but did perk up at the fact that he might get to take care of here.  
  
The three went to sit on Ms. Lambert’s porch and talked for there.  
  
Simon mostly kept quiet and was there to calm down Ralph if he ever got erratic, but for the most part Ralph was fairly calm, just fidgety.  
  
Simon was relieved when he saw Ralph starting to warm up.  
  
Ms. Lambert mostly asked about his favorite type of lily, or other small, harmless questions like that, and at the end, how Ralph would feel about taking care of her garden with her.  
  
Then, she went up to Simon.  
  
“I, again, can’t promise anything, but I do want to help him. He seems very caring, but just has had...a lot throughout his life. I don’t want to intimidate him, so maybe he could work here on weekends? Starting next one, and we’ll see what happens from there.”  
  
“Alright, thank you, so very much.”  
  
“Of course dear. I know both your hearts are in the right place.”

  


The week passed, and for the whole thing, Ralph almost never let go of Simon. It got to a point that he wasn’t really bothered by it anymore. Not to say he liked it, but he didn’t get the urge to flinch away anymore.  
  
Once Saturday came, Simon was glad to see that Ralph looked almost excited.  
  
“Do you like her?”  
  
“She is very kind. Ralph did not know that humans could be kind.”  
  
Simon smiled, one day he’d find out what happened to him, but for now he’d let him be happy.  
  
They walked over, Ralph bouncing slightly the whole way.  
  
Ms. Lambert was on her porch, waiting. She saw the two and got up to let them in. They exchanged greetings, and Lambert toured Ralph around the house and garden, showing him around. All the while, Ralph practically hummed with excitement.  
  
After about an hour of Simon hanging around to make sure everything was going alright, he said goodbye and thanked Ms. Lambert once again. Ralph seemed a little confused that Simon was leaving, but there wasn’t much trouble.  
  
Glad that everything was going okay, Simon left and headed back to Headquarters.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, in case you were wondering about Ms. Lambert's name, the actor who plays Simon is Ben Lambert, so I thought it'd be cool to implicate that in the story and then I just picked a random first name pfft.
> 
> Also, you may not see as much of Ralph as I kind of wanted in the first place, but he will be around  
> Also, if all of this seemed a bit rushed, I'm sorry, but keep in mind this is what Simon always does. To us it's Ralph, the cupcake with anger issues, but to him it's another android he wants to help.


	3. She's Coming Home

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING.  
> There are two moments in this chapter where's Simon's  
> well  
>  _issues_ start acting up.  
> The first is more subdued but is self deprecating, and the second he freaks out internally a lot.
> 
> Alright, this is the last chapter I'm prewriting before publishing! I went ahead and wrote the first three before throwing it out into the world  
> As always, hope you enjoy!

_”Welcome home, Simon.”_  
  
Simon was greeted by the familiar AI voice as he walked in. He looked around and after a quick check, no one seemed to be on the bottom floor.  
  
Everyone they’d been keeping temporarily in the back had managed to heal and move on in the past week, so for the first time in a while, it was just Jericho.  
  
Simon went upstairs to crash in his room for the first time in a while. When he fell back onto the bed, he swore nothing had ever felt more blissful.  
  
Despite how much he really did care about Ralph, the guy didn’t give him a second’s rest, let alone time with himself.  
  
“Hey Simon.”  
  
The poor blonde nearly sprung off the bed in startlement.  
  
He recognized Josh’s chuckle from the doorframe.  
  
“rA9 man, it’s just me.”  
  
Simon sat up, disgruntled. “Josh, I swear to rA9, I’ll make like North and chuck you out the window.”  
  
“Oh yeah, about North, she’s gonna be back tonight”  
  
Simon felt his gut drop and he fell back onto his bed. “Did you tell Markus?”  
  
“Markus is the one who told me”  
  
Simon covered his face with his arm, a pit growing in his stomach.  
  
“Do you know when she’ll be here?”  
  
“Apparently, she’s on the way home, so twenty minutes? Are you okay dude? You look like I just told you she died.”  
  
“Yeah,” he lied. “I’m tired, is all. Long week.”  
  
Simon knew Josh didn’t exactly believe him, but neither of them said it.  
  
“Alright,” Joshed pushed off from the doorframe. “Get some rest and head down in about ten minutes. She’ll punt you to your maker if you’re not there to say hello after a month of her being gone.  
  
“Yeah, thanks.”  
  
Simon heard the footsteps of Josh leaving.  
  
He didn’t have anything against North personally, and even understood when she wanted to kill him back on Stratford tower those many months ago, but...however much he hated to admit it, seeing her and Markus together pained him. He wanted to be happy for them, he really did, but somehow it became harder and harder with time.  
  
He counted as the seconds ticked down. He loathed the wait but didn’t want the outcome either. Of course, waiting is all he’s ever done.  
  
Before Markus came, He was the unofficial leader of Jericho. He’d been around longer than almost anyone, save Lucy. And as so, his word became respected. But what did he tell them? To wait. To sit around because at least they were ‘free’. He’d seen so much of the pain and suffering that could possibly be endured or put on someone and simply stood by.  
  
He was the one they trusted, that they listened to and all he did was lead them to a life of sitting in the dark, of _hoping_ things would change. Because even if you did nothing, at least you were alive and safe. Safe you could slowly without someone else doing it for you. You were free. Free to wait. Free to sit and see your biocomponents fail one by one and watch the thirium flow out of you. Simon had led them to a life of curling up in a corner as your mind palace failed, watching as others could do nothing to stop you shut down and the last words you’d ever utter were “If I’m alive, is this what living is?”  
  
That’s what Simon had done. He valued life more than living.  
  
Then Markus came, and changed everything. He did what Simon couldn’t. Markus was leader.  
  
Feeling nauseous, he sat up and removed his arm from covering his eyes. Without him realizing, he’d dug his nails into his palms, leaving small blue trickles running down his arm and into his jacket before the punctures sealed up and disappeared, just like the others before them.  
  
He sluggishly got up and went to the nearest sink, in the bathroom, and wiped down his arm. He should head down about now.  
  
He shrugged off his jacket and threw on the thick black hoodie that he always used as a source of comfort before he headed downstairs.  
  
Markus and Josh were playing a game of speed chess in the living room. Despite the fact that it was hard for anything but a draw to happen between two androids, they still made it work.  
  
They finished quickly (in a tie) and as they were putting the pieces back they heard the door slide open with a _”Welcome home, North.”_  
  
The three got up and made their way over to the door, where North was standing, dragging a suitcase behind her. Even though androids didn’t really need to change clothes, when you’re going to be away for an unknown amount of time, even androids have to bring something.  
  
North set her suitcase down against the stairs and Markus walked up to her, bringing his hand to hers to interface. Simon glanced away.  
  
“Welcome home.”  
  
“I’m glad to be back”  
  
She broke off the interface before following Markus and the others back to the living room to sit.  
  
Josh was the first to speak up once they had sat down. “So what news from West Virginia?”  
  
“Things are calmed down, for now. Most the people were actually very kind, it was just the few who decided to be loud that were the problem. rA9, there was no end of meetings but I got through it” She smiled and turned to Markus. “There were times I wanted to shoot everyone there but through willpower I managed not to.” she said this while reaching for Markus’s hand.  
  
Simon spoke up without meaning to and said rushedly, “I should bring Carl down.” He stood up quickly and looked around before leaving the room and heading to Carl’s study room.  
  
In front of the door, Simon set his hand against the wall and steadied himself as the automatic doors slid open and Carl rolled his wheelchair out.  
  
“I take it North is home?”  
  
Simon’s throat hitched.  
  
“I won’t pester you about it, but nothing will come of you keeping your feelings and emotions inside.”  
  
Carl was the only person that had caught on Simon had more than friendly feelings for the face of the android revolution. It was never said outright, but the old man caught on quickly.  
  
“Even distracting myself doesn’t work anymore. I can normally deal but...she’d been away so long. I let my guard down.” He could hear faint talking from the living room, they seemed to have moved on from North’s trip.  
  
“Simon, boy, you need to either come to terms with it or let it out into the world. Either way, struggling and holding onto these thoughts does you no good.”  
  
There was a pause, “I’m going to take you to them now” Simon said, taking his hand off the wall and moving behind Carl’s wheelchair.  
  
North glowed when she saw Carl. All of the androids at Jericho had some to think of him as a father figure. Markus was still the one that took care of him for the most part, but now that Carl never really left the house, they didn’t see him as much, as he often stayed in his study.  
  
North half skipped over and knelt before him, clasping his hand. “I missed you, and you don’t know how much I wanted your guidance.”  
  
“I’d give it to you but you’d never follow it so shut up.” Carl chuckled.  
  
North stood up,“Oh, and Simon, I never greeted-” Simon saw North struggle for a moment as she first looked like she was moving to put a hand on his shoulder and then move out for a handshake before putting her hands in her pockets as Simon gave her a weak smile.  
  
North also knew something about Simon the others hadn’t picked up on. Like with Carl, it was never said, but she had noticed that Simon wasn’t a fan of being touched, and he was thankful for it.  
  
The others didn’t seem to notice the mini struggle North was going through and after a moment, she went back to sit down with Markus, hand on his.  
  
They talked the rest of the afternoon, alternating between various issues with androids and freedom and then just talking about whatever. What happened while she was gone, what experiences she’d had, etc. Simon was just happy that Markus and North were distracted from each other.  
  
At one point, the subject of Ralph came up and Simon had the chance to talk about him.  
  
“Honestly Simon, I dunno how you don’t self destruct from stress.” North said. Everyone else thought it was just because he was working hard, but he was thankful for the underlying sympathy.  
  
“We started a movement, and gaining freedom was only the first step, we can’t cop out now.”  
  
“Yeah,” Josh said. “That’s true. I’m always afraid I’m not doing enough, but at this point in time, things are settling down, hell, since you dropped off Ralph earlier today, for the first time in months we’re the only ones here.”  
  
“Well, Ralph is only there for weekends as of now. I want to get him into a new life, but he’s got a long way to go.” Simon said, lacing his fingers through each other.  
  
This time Markus spoke. “I wish we’d had you during the revolution Simon.”  
  
The room went silent.  
  
“I was, for a time.”  
  
“Not long enough.” Josh said.  
  
The room went silent once again.  
  
“I sacrificed my life for the cause. I understood going in that there was a high probability I was going to die. I wasn’t there to see our people freed, but I intend to make up for it.”  
  
When no one spoke for a long time, Simon sat up and turned to Carl. “I can take you back.”  
  
The frail old man nodded and Simon wheeled him away. Once he was at the study room, Carl spoke to him.  
  
“You can’t do this forever”  
  
“I know”  
  
Carl wheeled himself into the room and the automatic doors shut behind him. Once he was alone, memories came flooding back to him of getting shot, being left on Stratford Tower as North, Markus, and Josh escaped, shooting connor, realizing he was going to die, and then shooting himself. The fear and pain he remembered all too well, and he was sure he would decades into the future. He remembered being suddenly awoken and crying out for Markus when he was in the dark. He remembered hearing Markus’s voice and then pleading him not to leave as was plunged back into nothingness.  
  
When he found out later that it was Connor imitating Markus’s voice, he felt a strange betrayal even though Connor had been machine at the time. Thought, after a while, Connor and him had formed a bond that could be easily called friendship.  
  
Due to Connor and his partner Lt. Anderson working in the DPD, they didn’t see each other much, but enjoyed the time they had. Whenever their past was brought up, it was an awkward subject for the both of them.  
  
Once Simon had calmed down enough to return, he saw Josh walking down the hallway. “Yo, you left quick dude. Are you alright? Markus wanted you to know he apologized for bringing up a touchy subject.”  
  
Simon felt a pang and said. “Yeah, just...that’s-that’s not a time I like to remember.”  
  
Josh walked by him, putting a hand on Simon’s shoulder on the way. “It’s alright.”  
  
In his state, Simon almost passed out, but he forced out a halfhearted _”Yeah_ and quickly ran downstairs again, without really a purpose.  
  
He quickly realized that he made the wrong choice. With no one else in the room, Markus and North were alone for the first time in a month.  
  
They were standing embraced, lips crashed together.  
  
The sight made Simon feel empty and heat run to his face. He turned tail and ran out the door, into the evening air before collapsing in the driveway, nails digging into his knees in an effort to calm down.  
  
He felt wetness prick at the edge of his eyes but pushed it back.  
  
He stayed like that, digging into himself and pushing any thoughts away, trying to blank out his mind.  
  
He couldn’t stay at Jericho, not tonight.  
  
Slowly, he eased up and opened his eyes to look at the sky.  
  
It was painted all shades of crimson and orange. He cleared his thoughts and focused on the colors. His thirium pump slowed back down to normal and he finally felt like he could release the tension in his hands.  
  
He didn’t know where to go. He berated himself, knowing he was just being driven by spastic feelings. He was going to walk back into Jericho like nothing happened.  
  
He stood up okay enough, but everytime he attempted to make a step back towards the steps of Headquarters, his legs locked and went weak and his vision started acting up.  
  
Accepting that even if he was being irrational, there was nothing he could so about it, so he thought of where he could go.

Then with a sudden realization,  
  
_Connor_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fun Fact - My irl name is actually Simon so there _mayyy_ have been a slight bit of self projection onto this poor dude.
> 
> This chapter was meant to be merged with the next one I'm writing, but it turned out too long as is so I had to cut it in half.
> 
> There may not be an update for a while, as I'm pretty busy in all of July, but I'll try to get one or two more chapters in before August.  
> Of course, I'm open to constructive criticism and feel free to tell me of any grammar or spelling mistakes!

**Author's Note:**

> If you have any questions, feel free to ask me, otherwise, I hope you enjoyed!  
> And if you find any typos or grammar mistakes, or even constructive criticism, let me hear it! I'm focused on making this enjoyable for the reader, so I wanna hear it!


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